Facebook FAQ's

Frequently Asked Questions you may have about Facebook:

1. What is Facebook?
A: Facebook's main function is to provide an avenue for naturally unfocused students to practice procrastination. According to our statistics, Facebook user numbers increase around June and November of each year which bizarrely enough, coincides with the examination timetables of most universities and schools.

Facebook also functions as a place for people who wish to stalk their friends without wanting to look too much like Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. This as a result has coined the term "Facebook stalking" which involves the process of continually checking your friends Facebook pages at least 10 times in one day to note any updates to their social activities. An example of this would be with Lisa and Sarah. Lisa wanted to see if Sarah was going to be available for catching up on Thursday night this week. Instead of asking her in person or even sending a simple text message, she checked her Facebook events page to see that Sarah was already going to be attending the Toga Party that night. The next time Lisa saw Sarah was on Friday morning. When she asked Sarah how the Toga Party was, Sarah asked her how she knew about it. Unsurprisingly, Lisa received quite a weird stare from Sarah when she said that she had Facebook stalked her to find out.

2. Why does it matter whether I have one friend or 3,000?

Facebook likes to encourage people to believe they are popular based solely on the amount of people in their friendship list. By classifying their account as "In Progress" when they only have 143 friends, Facebook labels those they deem to be underdeveloped hence the expression "In Progress". Its basically a nice way of saying "You are a loser and you should get more friends, NOW!"

This phenomena has also instigated the bizarre practice of people only becoming "official" with their partners only until they have changed their Facebook relationship status. An example of this relates to Sam and Leila. Leila and Sam have been seeing eachother for a while now but when asked if they were going out, neither one could give an answer. Both said that they were unsure about what their "relationship label" i.e boyfriend/girlfriend, exclusive etc, was because Facebook had not determined it yet.

3. Why should I use Facebook?
Facebook gives people the false sense of security that they actually have a social life. By saying "I'll talk to you on FB chat" or "I'll write on your wall", we believe that we are actually having real conversations with our friends. Similarly, face-to-face gossip relays into commenting on people's statuses, photos, wall posts and various other activities that you can complete on Facebook. This allows people to believe that they are interacting with their friendship circle when the reality is, they are merely making comment on it. Finally, Facebook gets everyone on the internet at pretty much the same time on various evenings i.e 7:00pm Monday night, so that the government does not need to worry about spending money on providing youth centers or other creative outlets for them.

Considering Copyright

Ok, so it took me a while but eventually, I knew I would have to hop on the Copyright bandwagon that everyone else has so diligently blogged about during the course of this semester. To be honest, I believe that the topic of Copyright has never really interested me and hence, that is the reason why I could not be bothered to address in on my blogging site but recently, I had an experience that was similar to what one may call "a breach of copyright".

For those of you who do not know me, I love to write for film. My most prized possession is my ideas diary which I am constantly writing in, regardless of how convenient a time it is. This book is literally the most valuable thing I own and no amount of monterary value could see me torn apart from it (I realise I really shouldn't be revealing just how amazing this book is to totaly strangers on the internet who may try and steal it, but I have faith in you all that you wouldn't do that).

The reason why I brought this particular facet of my personal life into this post though is to demonstrate my annoyance at recently stumbling upon Rowan Woods' new film, Winged Creatures, starring Dakota Fanning, Forest Whittaker, Kate Beckinsale and many more. The film delves into the psyche of the human mind from a group of people who have all experienced the same type of emotional trauma, in this case, a random shooting in a Los Angeles Diner.

I was so shocked when I read the synopsis for the film that I think I very nearly fainted (which I never do by the way) and wanted to hurl my Ideas Diary out the window (I didn't don't worry. There is no point in scrounging around outside my balcony to try and find it). You see, two years ago, an idea came into my head for a feature which explored the ways in which humans react to the same tragedy, caused by a hold-up, at a diner, in Los Angeles. To make it even creepier, I worked on Rowan Woods' last production, Three Acts of Murder. Spooky ey?

Now, don't get me wrong, I am in no way insinuating that Mr Woods "stole" my idea and that this can give me ample leverage to sue him for copyright infringement. But it did beg the question:

"Is it possible to copyright a thought?"

I consulted my notes from Lecture 5 of this semester and unfortunately, realised I had already answered my own question weeks ago. According to Shaun Miller, our guest speaker for the day

"You get copyright automatically once you create the work. It does not have to be registered."

"Great!" I thought. Now it would seem that I actually have a basis for suing Rowan Woods. That was until I went on to read a bit more:

"Two criteria has to be meet
1. It has to be original
2. It has to be in a material form (written down or be in a hard copy form)

A verbal idea for example that is not written down or in a material form cannot be protected with copyright.

Bummer. Well there goes that idea.

But wait!! Didn't I say before that I HAD written my story idea down two years ago for a LA diner, hold up movie similar to Rowan Woods' Winged Creatures?
(Scrounges around room desperately trying to find book...)

*5 minutes later*

As it turns out, I DID write down my idea so now, it would seem, I can sue Mr Woods for copyright infringement. However, its when I start to research into copyright a little further that I realise that maybe that's not the best idea.

First of all, I would need to get myself a lawyer. That alone would cost me anywhere between $75 to $300 an hour! From there, I would probably spend nearly $100,000 in legal fees just to get my case to the Supreme Court.

Hmm.. maybe another time.

Well, for those of you who were like me and had never considered copyright law, I hope this post has helped. Till next time, don't worry. Be happy!

Lucky to be alive

After "picking up" The Age this morning (i.e nicking it from outside the security department at RMIT), I wasn't suprised to see that yet again, another depressing, heart-wrenching, overally emotionalised report had been placed on the front page. The story this time was about the recent sentencing of Leigh Robertson, a man who was found guilty of murdering Tracey Greensbury in April last year. According to the article, Robertson had previously committed a murder back in 1968 involving his ex-girlfriend Valerie Ethel Dunn. He had been spared the death penalty at the time because of a campaign to save another murderer at the time, Ronald Ryan. In short, had it not been for the action of Governor Sir Rohan Delacombe, "Tracey Greenbury would still be alive".

And that is where I step in.

Firstly, newspapers are not bloody fortune tellers. Who are they to say that Tracey Greensbury WOULD be alive today? They have no idea of the lifestyle she lead, the people she knew, the things she did each day. For all we know, she could have been a drug addict, crazy drunk who was going to end up either in a wheel chair thanks to the aid of a tree or overdosing in the same manner as Anna Nicole-Smith.

But I'll excuse myself purely for this experimentation. Lets give Tracey the benefit of the doubt. Lets say she was your girl-next-door, your cookies and cream, sweet as sugar, charming young girl who gave to charity and never ate chocolate after dinner. The reality is The Age still could not have predicted if she would still be alive today even if she had such a lifestyle.

People die all the time. Its a fact of life. Some die in more pleasant circumstances, like in their sleep. Some die in more distressing events, like in a car crash. And some die at the hands of others.

In the end, we can not decide the fate of somebody purely by saying what could have been. If anything, Tracey's death was a blessing in disguise for not only the women Robertson raped in 1983 but for Valerie Ethel Dunn, the original victim in this whole saga. Tracey was the straw that broke Robertson's back and there is no way now that a parole board with any sense would let this monster out in the public again.

And so my dear readers, I beg you.
Do not cry.
For Tracey's death was no lie.
Though she suffered at the hands of another,
We can safely say it saved another,
And it was this courage and bravery that was needed to set Val free.

I thought you might all like a little something different to spice up your day. Until next time, don't worry. Be Happy.