Oh this one was just too good not to do.For those of you that don't know me, I am madly, crazy, gooishly (yes I did just make up my own word in a blog), in love with the opposite sex (i.e the male variety) and relish any chance I can get to grab a sneak peek of said species' anatomy. Hence why I spend a lot of time at the beach with all my clothes on staring at "the sea".
What relevance does this have to do with the Victorian Government's latest crackdown on the latest spite in knife attacks within the Melbourne CBD? Well, according to The Age, under new laws, police forces will now receive the authority to stop and search anyone they please in a designated area of their choosing.
THAT BASICALLY MEANS TELLING REALLY, REALLY HOT GUYS TO GET THEIR KIT OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET!!!!
Ok, so it's probably not as risqué as that but I'm sure if they were really suspicious of somebody, they wouldn't just allow them the walk off with a quick pat down and a "be good now you hear" from Sergeant Plod.
No, no. My vision of these new laws goes something along the lines of this:
A trio of really, really hot guys (aka, Wentworth Miller, Channing Tatum and Chace Crawford lookalikes), are walking through Federation Square with one of them displaying an odd bulge in his left front pocket (no ladies, not THAT kind of bulge). Anyway, Detective Sergeant Williams asks the boys to step over here quietly for a quick "search". Having been unable to produce anything resembling the suspicious bulge, the kind policeman asks oh lets say the Chace Crawford lookalike just for fun, to take off his shirt so that he can be certain he is not carrying any suspicious weapons.
The shirt comes off and BAM!. Yes, that ladies and gentlemen, is the sound of a hundred female jaws hitting the pavement of Fed Square in awe of this picturesque replica of the male figure. From there, the man is searched with nothing resembling the "bulge" (ok so maybe it was THAT kind of bulge) and the policeman quietly apologises informing CC that he is free to go. The men depart, leaving behind a hundred women all looking like they are attempting to catch snow flakes on their tongues in the middle of summer.
And that my loyal readers, is why you should not despair at yet another attempt to limit our rights to lawful protest but rejoice in the slim chance that you may get a really hot guy to flash his pecs.
Until next time, loyal readers, don't worry. Be happy!
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